I will not ask you for something, then take it right off the shelf anyway…just because I’m somewhat certain you want me to have it.
I will trust you when you say, “Don’t play with fire”.
I will not ask for help, then do it on my own when I don’t hear you coming.
I will ask you for advice, and I will try my best to actually walk it out. I won’t waste the words you speak.
I want to spend time with you, I’ll actually lie in bed and listen.
I’ll let you grow your own children. You tell me when to play and interact with the other kids, I know you’re they’re father too.
I’ll tell you stories of what I think is going on, yeah. That’s fun. But I know you know the whole story. Thanks for telling me what I need to know, when I need to know it.
….Abba. I belong to you. And I’m sorry for taking your sons and daughters lives into my own hands. I’m sorry for taking things from your special cabinet that I asked to get into, but you said, “No…not now”. I’m sorry for falling asleep before you told me the rest of the story.
…Abba. I belong to you. There are certain scars on my hands that may or may not leave in this lifetime. Thank you for letting me keep the function of my hands, though.
Dad. I believe you. I will wait for you to come help. I refuse to call on you and leave the house without you just because I don’t know how long it will take for you to get ready…or for me to be ready.
Teach me whatever I need to learn God. I see now that my wisdom is so limited, I’m just a boy.
Come and direct this flame.
I’ve lived in a world where Dad is late. I’ve lived in a world where Abba is too silent. I’ve lived in a world where too many children are left hurting. I’ve lost my hands and feet, my head and heart…I’ve broken others hearts and put my own band-aids on their wounds–when they needed a real physician.
I’ve gone to bed before you were done speaking, and I’ve awoken to terror.
I’ve also been caught in a dead sprint by my father. Both his hand of correction and his hand of embrace.
I await you God. I will stop Samuel things…Not Samuel Lee Going…just Samuel Lee alive.
Coming awake now Dad. Teach me to dougie. I mean live.
Reblogged this on Chronicles of D.ying T.o S.elf and commented:
This post was really touching.. I had to read it twice to let it fully sink in, and found myself plunging into a deep conversation with God about Him being my Daddy. What that means for our relationship. And how that means I should look at Him. Not to mention the defined ways of how He looks at me as His little girl.
God gave me an encouragement through one of my teammates during DTS. It was a pictures of a little girl, and a reminder that this is how He always will see me. Yes, I’m a warrior for Him. Yes, I’m an ambassador. But I will forever be His little girl; precious and beloved in His sight. And that, my friends, is a beautiful thing.